As an editor, I recieve hundreds of press releases about new products and services in my inbox every day. Sometimes they're relevant to what I do, and sometimes they're so far off base I can't fathom how my name got on the mailing list (Turkish political newsletter??). But every so often I get one that's just plain hilarious, where the marketing rep was either trying to be funny or just having one of those who's-gonna-read-this-anyway type of moments. They oftem make my morning.
Here's a sampling of subject lines from some of the weirdest, most WTF press releases I've gotten in the past year:
First Ever Convertible Jacket to Neck Pillow -- Bound to be stylish, right? Who ever thinks "Man, I want to buy a jacket, but what I really need is a neck pillow. How will I ever solve this problem?"
American Women Learn to Kill their Attackers for Better Chance of Survival -- Uh, what? Who's getting killed and why? Turns out this is a press release for some new personal defense system. I am greatly concerned for anyone who thinks they need one.
Baby Hair Gel - Do babies really need hair products beyond shampoo? How about baby pomade or baby hair spray? I want my baby to have a beehive.
Story Idea: "You Can Get Cellulite WHERE?" - A little imagination can go a long way with this one.
Chickies Cleavage Coverage is the Hottest Stocking Stuffer in Tinseltown - This one just sounded perverted, which is hilarious considering the nature of the product.
Fashion Trend: Is the Fanny Pack Back? - NO.
Pharm Giant Salesforce Goes Green with High-Fashion Handbags - Because you've always wanted a handbag designed by a pharmaceutical company. Obvs.
The Grand Daddy of Underpants - Could there be anything sexier? I keep imagining Homer Simpson's dad in a pair of tighy whities.
Valentine's Day: Guys Signing on to Learn How to Blow Dry their Woman's Hair @ Blow Dry Boot Camp - What's there to learn other than 1) Turn the blow dryer on, and 2) Dry her hair? I love that a blow-drying boot camp exists. It makes me picture a line of guys in camoflague holding hair dryers and being screamed at by a drill sergant as their wet-haired girlfriends look on.
NEWS: America Likes Big Butts and It Can Not Lie - I would pay $100 for this to be the main headline on ccn.com for a whole day.
Vajazzling: Body Bling for "Down There" - Yep, this exists. If you're reading this and you've tried it, I think you're weird.
Hibernation is for Bears, Not Your Legs! - Three guesses as to what this one's about ... if you guessed the ultimate cure for restless leg syndrome, you're wrong. It's for shaving cream.